The magic word

Ack!  What happened to January?  I have been stalking my friends blogs (and you two know who you are) and I am always bummed when they haven't updated in a while, and I just realized I haven't even put up Christmas pictures yet!  That still won't happen tonight, because I can't be bothered with my computer and camera right now, but I have had this story rattling around in my head for a while, and I thought it was time to post it.
One of my motivations for this blog was Stephanie learning to talk and the hysterical things she comes up with.  The other side of that is her learning what words mean and how to use them correctly.  This can be frustrating for me, because sometimes her use of the things we say can sound awfully sassy, even though I realize that is not her intent (ask me when she is 15 and I will be able to tell you a different story, I imagine!).  For instance, there was the period of time that we spent trying to teach her to ask for things nicely by saying please.  She now frequently asks nicely for things and says Thank You, and You're Welcome.  The unintended consequence of these lessons were the occasions where she insisted that WE say please for absolutely everything we asked her to do... At the time, it came across as super sassy, but she eventually got a handle on what was please worthy and what was not and stopped demanding we say please for every little request.  And, on the flip side, I have learned that sometimes we can say please several times to no avail, and it seems to not be as magical of a word by which I have often heard it referred.  Stephanie is not always cooperative, in fact.  There are moments during which one might even call her uncooperative.  One might also acknowledge that she is four years old and one should probably have more realistic expectations, though one might defend oneself by reminding you that high expectations are good!  The other night, though, as I made her scoot out of the way to make room for her sister, she moved.  Immediately.  No questions, no complaints, and it occurred to me that is nearly always the case.  When it comes to Gwen needing something, Stephanie obliges.  No please or bargaining required.  She just does.  Gwen needs a bath?  Stephanie pulls together a towel, outfit and diaper before you can get upstairs.  She is complaining in the high chair while I get her more food?  Stephanie gets her a toy.  We have to leave story time to change a diaper?  Stephanie is in the bathroom and handing me wipes.
There are moments that Stephanie gets annoyed with her.  Mostly she doesn't like getting kicked during reading time or getting her haired pulled (and really, who can blame her), but in that moment that she moved over so Gwen could be with us, I realized that her full cooperation with Gwen is really something very special, and that maybe Sister is actually the magic word.